Yesterdays News

Gone are the days of younger
when it all just seemed so much slower
when you would sit in lessons and wonder, why the time crept passed so shyly.


Sometimes it will hit me hard, like a slap around my face
bringing with it the sudden pain and then Ill remain in this for a long time. 
I don't want you again though, if I am truthful about it, I don't want the old same mundane 
I want the new knocks me flying takes my breath away times
You know, like when you are with somebody new and its all a game 
A game you always win, a game you never get bored of, that is until the game ends...


Weekends fly by so much faster than I can remember
Age seems to fall into one big ball of 1 thing and its madness
I don't seem to see how quickly it goes
people are in our lives for mere seconds and then they are gone
just that second of eye contact, the glisten in their eyes, the smile on their face
the swapping telephone numbers, the promising to call, the texting the flirting, the wanting it all
the realising it has already ended, it ended when I walked away, when there was no lingering farewell kiss
just the whispered goodbye, just the hope in our eyes that, that wont be the last time


The always wanting the same old, but realising now its not meant to be 
it was not me back then,
I wasn't filled with glee or happiness just wanting the more and not getting it.


So not letting it get me 
Yesterdays news
it can be so predictable as we all know the end
we all see what happens next and where it leads us
down dark paths, winding streets, flickering lamps in the blistering rain
the wind blowing away the day that's just ending
the moon is out and big and bright and it glistens in the night sky as we all go to sleep
to dream about the days that have been and gone
about the people we long to see again
one day we say as we drift off into our deep sleep, our winding dreams, our wishes and longing 
us remembering being young and those people who no longer say good bye to us being there
grandparents that were once such celebrities in our eyes
the tears that fell and drowned us all when they left us 
the spinning world that just continues
the morning sun creeping through our curtains
the birds singing the tunes we all know so well
the getting up and ready and just carrying on 
working, learning, earning, mourning, missing, grieving, loving, wanting, needing, waiting, wishing, seeing, feeling, being, living, happy 
yesterdays news is something we all see
trying not to be 
too sad when it leaves
when the night ends
pleading with time to stop for us
praying to have one more moment with these people
wishing that you could turn it all around 
seeing it all disappear 
the night becomes a cloud above our heads




Accepting it all just happens
we are all to move on
you cant look backwards much longer
you miss out on all that's today otherwise




Gay Pride was amazing
Laughs were aplenty
Memories are etched in deep into my beating heart


Next stop... 
My Adventure - Germany.... Planning for my future
creating the now 
leaving the before
and looking forward to the after



x