Old dirty towel

Maybe it has always been me
One of those faces that you want to punch
Rubbing people up the wrong way
Like a new cheap shoe
Not ever purposely irritating
Just misunderstood
I can't even tell you how it feels to be the one on the back foot
Always hiding myself incase I'm misinterpreted
Kind of makes you want to throw in the towel
The towels dirty now though and has been lying on the floor in the laundry room for years
Can't give up
Not in my nature
Just going to push through and hopefully get through
Watch me as I leave
I might do a runner

Together we conquer

Can barely stand the rain now
Previous experiences drained me of all my strength until there was nothing left
The days seemed so long it was like missing the evening or something
The light never sank
Only my heart in this cold hard existence
The battle felt over long before
But I was still stood up
Fists outstretched
Pain and determination in my stare
But inside I was broken
Beating my last breath as I covered my face to lessen the pain

This feeling is just ongoing and never ending sometimes
The days have turned to months with weeks being overlooked

Not a day goes by though where you aren't there next to me
You are always there waiting and watching
You take my hand and lead me away when the battle gets too fierce
You protect me
We protect each other but sometimes I find it too much to bare
I can barely stand up with out the room spinning
I can barely recollect our conversations because my mind is so preoccupied
But when my attention is on point we are perfect
We go together like the leaves in autumn
Nothing can blow us down
Nothing can conquer us because we conquered ourselves individually years before
We know who we are
We were both left broken against some street lamp and we found our way back home
We healed our hearts and in our own way were reborn
We did it before we knew each other
We have been doing that for years
Now we are together and we are stronger
We play for the same side
We have the same end goals
Life can be a boomerang but because of what we have been through we see the curve before it turns
We see the direction
We expect it
And with might and determination we catch it before it hits us

Nothing in the empty...but hold on

There's nothing left in this drawer anymore
It doesn't matter how many times I search for items it's just bare
I can't keep trailing this house looking for something I now can't even remember the face of
It just fills my head with cobwebs of reeled off words of mess that noone can even understand
It's like the language is foreign yet noone can speak it

I can't keep going down this road
The houses are falling apart and nobody leaves the lights on and even though I come here often I can barely see the wood from the trees and one day I'll just crash

I often see a crash happen in my minds eye
God doesn't know why the vision flies passed or why I remember it but for that split second I'm in a collision then bang I blink and its just a mindless thought

The trains are always packed full of people it's almost like a let's see how many people we can get into this small carriage today type of game
And even though most mornings I'm a second a way from missing the trains I make it just in time and slam my tired cold aching body next to another comatosed individual as we get flung sideways all the way into the city praying noone else will force us to actually hit personal space boundaries and people all stand swaying hoping they don't fall, loads of texts and social media just flashing in the faces of the silent people expressionless scrolling over and over the same old images that noone comments on or even understands why they are looking or care or anything
Then a student starts swearing words you could only dream of knowing at their age
I say dream of knowing with a stained sarcastic tinge to it as let's be honest when has swearing ever been classy?
For a pescatarian a lot of children discuss having beef these days
I do often worry for the future generations if this is the crap they discuss publicly on trains before 8am on a Monday morning at the grand old age of 12

Where was i
Can you tell I'm full to the brim can you feel the stressed out moans within the text of this fastly typed out speel that I can't keep inside my head tonight
No real end nor beginning just a Tuesday evening drawing to a close
People all over this country settling down for the night
Children in bed dreaming of there been and gone day excited for the next
Adults praying for the weekend or the next pay day and thinking its wet cold and dark, where is spring already?
Spring brings with it the hope and faith in the birds and the fluffy clouds blue skies stretched out over the view from our back bedrooms window
Tranquil times of flowers and flies coexisting in the environment
Warm sun across your face
Squinting as you drive down the same road which no longer needs the side lights or house lamps because now you can see where you are and where you want to be
The overgrown hedges have been tamed and trimmed and now resemble pride and family parties
The house is full of life and smiles and love drowns every corner of every newly painted room
You can only look back to faded out memories of the cold nights in the stripped back walls
Watching the rain fall through the curtains that barely block out the yellow tinged Street light that lights up the road in which you live
The dust and dust sheets will soon be gone and replaced with new fresh feelings and life

Hold on to the vibrant future that is not too far away now
Breathe it in deep and remain in control of this situation
All will be calm eventually
All with be smiles
The karaoke machine will soon hail out loud tuneful sounds that will bring laughter and cheer
You will lie here soon surrounded by your family and be looking back on this poem with a heavy heart to recall how bad you once may have felt..
It will all be white noise soon..