Choking on my feelings

Such transparency in your actions
Such lies in your words
Your eyes are drenched in mistrust
I don't know how you sleep at night
Your words cause pain like no other
Your actions poison my oxygen
I can't deal with it anymore.

I feel free when you aren't around
Like I have no limits and no orders
Once you are back you kill the smiles
You starve me of happiness
You put me on edge.

I hate how you can be so up and so down
I hate how you make me feel unimportant
You take my confidence and switch it for insecurities
I struggle to get through my day

The worst thing of all is you probably don't even notice
You are too wrapped up in yourself
You swan around like nothing can touch you, but if I look closer I see damage
I see troubled messes
I see denial
I see ignorance
I see unhappiness and confusion
I would of been there, and helped you sort it
But you can't treat me your way
Your way is cruel
And I don't want that
I don't need you
I'm sorry but you're alone this time.