Not So Long Ago I Had This Day...

Wash me away
don't hold your breath
don't wipe the tears from my eyes
don't try to hug me
don't try to love me 
don't try to tell me its OK

let it all just fall away
and break away
and rip away from the seams
I can see it all now
I am accepting it
I wont try to catch it or stop it


Come on rain
fall harder, break things as you land
drown all the spiders and the rats
drown all the sorrow 
flood the streets
flood the world 
flood it all so we can start again

Build it all up from the ground
scrape through the ruins finding the lost ones
begging for it all back
looking back and wishing it was here 

As I look to the ground
and lose my concentration
and as I struggle to keep eye contact and motivation
and when you are tired of asking me to try
and when all you can do is watch me cry
and when I wont hug you or tell you I'm OK 
just walk away
leave me be
let me see the mistakes I have made
leave me here to pick it all up and make a sense out of it


Nothing to say, nothing to think of,
nothing to worry or cry about
nothing to miss, nothing to want, nothing to dream or stress about
nobody here, nobody there, nothing to look after or care for
just a day, just a moment, just a flicker of drama

Tears they fell, so hard it made me sick
sick I was until I fell asleep
dreams were warped and dragged me deeper
into the rooms Id locked away moons ago
they were all opened over and over and the worries and stresses got louder and louder
and the panic set in, and the loneliness drowned me and I couldn't get up and I couldn't get out
and I was just drowning and spinning and crying and hating and hurting and needing and wanting and seeing
and that's when it set in that this can not happen
and this is a one off and this is a nightmare and this does so happen to freshen the closets
to system restore your mind and soul

................................................ Now its gone, now its gone, now its gone now its gone....