Curiosity killed the heart

I was meaning to write this earlier
but things have a habit of getting in the way
anyway I am here now 
and I shall now type away


So much has changed since before I was typing
so much more has become my focus
I now feel I have a reason to be
and that is something quite new


I wont say just yet what I have in mind as I don't wish to jinx it at all
I will say however that its not the same light or sight or heart anymore that I carry


I decided I would rid all the old and finally let go
and I did this using technology
ridding my number and most of the names and now I feel less cluttered up


For now it is a new sheet of paper 
a blank canvas
i have every color I have ever wanted and they are for my disposal
I am reading a new book getting lost in their lives,
travelling through the words as they intended
not letting people or places or the weather try to drain it


it being the happiness that i feel surrounding my existence
the reality that is here and all around me
the family that i love and wish to shout it off rooftops
the people in my life with their kindness and love
the person i am becoming through the nights and days
the language that is changing as i type away
the rhythm in my writing sounds ever-so skip-pity
ever-so jumpity and happy and go lucky
the sadness is over and that was a chapter I bared well
I tried not to ignore it, i embraced it in case you couldn't tell
I got oh so deep i forgot my way out
although this was the lesson to learn and look at me now


I am still only 5'7'' although i feel much taller
my hair is longer and my eyes seem so much deeper
my soul is alight but with love and want
and I'm grabbing it all with both hands now and not letting anything out my sight


I will have to go now however as i am in the middle of something else
as i said the time is flying and the list is getting longer
new phone, new hair color new attitude new page


new new new


see I knew deep down i had the strength in me
it was just about the finding and the moving through
this amazing journey we call living. 

When I just have to write.... it looks like this :)

When you feel hopeless - stop a moment
when you think all is lost- calm yourself
when you look out the window and all you see is rain- remember the sun will shine 
when you want it all to go away - just stop and think




You are just a spec in this world
you are just moving around this crazy little path of yours
you need to have those bad moments
you need to learn to work through them 
you need to go up a level in life
that little bit stronger
with more determination 
with more ambition to try harder


So when you feel hopeless - stop a moment
take a long deep breath
and remember you have been through things before
you have had the sunny days too
you have had the days filled with love and warmth and all things bright
and you will get it all again too
so just have a little trust 
dust yourself off 
you win some, you lost some
but you must carry on :)