As the sun had set

The sun sets much earlier now it seems

The dreams seem to be more vivid

The thoughts that control my daily life are emotional

The way I felt before has reappeared

I cant tell you any lies anymore

I dont wish to delve into it again

I dont wish to soak myself in the once used water that I relied on once upon a time

I dont wish to continue this drag through my days

I dont wish to count down my time here on earth

I dont wish to think too much about you or what you are up to 

I dont wish to miss you at times when I feel most weak

I dont wish to look up at the moon and think can you see it too

I dont wish to carry on this carry on film that classically recalls at this time each night

I wont go over and over the whys and the whats

I wont go over the fact that you called

I wont keep myself from letting you go anymore

I wont let you 

I cant let you

I forgive you

I will let it go

Over now that the sun has set

Over now the night has arrived

Over now the tears have dried and stained my face 

Over now I have forgotten how you sound

Over now you are no longer a name on my page

I will forgive you for all that happened

Fireworks will brighten my sky next week

and I will see the moon

I will see the stars

and I will let it all go

for one last time.

[Just the thoughts that were in my head - wanting to escape]

31/10/11  17:32pm

And please don't stand so close to me
I'm having trouble breathing
I'm afraid of what you'll see right now
I give you everything I am
All my broken heart beats
Until I know you understand