Mere Mortals

What could they tell us, if we had the time to ask
What wisdom could they instill onto us
for we are just mere mortals in this town too
we might be fresher faced and always moaning
but still mere

What could they tell us about the olden days
you know, about the times that were actually hard
not these days where because a phone is slow we lose our cool
i mean real battles like the wars

I often wonder in my quiet times about the experiences of people
of any person really but just the notion that they also live
they also have really bad days and cant cope
i think long and hard and get myself all worked up

I have some relatives who are no longer here
and I could kick myself for thinking this all too late
For they were sat in there chairs all day with there heads full of memories
I wish I had plucked at them
asked them the questions that mattered
I know as a youngster, I was scared of them
intimidated by there big chairs and big slippers and stern faces
sat silently in the corner with there cups of tea
asking for me to come up to them and receive my present or kiss there cheek
they were not mere mortals to me
they were royalty
I would often stare into the floor incase they asked me a question

What was I scared of?
If i could go back, i would have asked them, what there favourite subject in school was? There most treasured recipe? What it felt like when they fell in love?
What it was like being older?
What they believed life was all about?

What could they tell us, if we had the time to ask
What wisdom could they instill onto us
for we are just mere mortals in this town too
we might be fresher faced and always moaning
but still mere

And What Is....

and what is the ending
is it the last breath
the last beat in our heart
or is it a life without love
is it that moment in which you have nobody and nothing
and you are just walking around in this life empty
what does it mean to have nothing

and what is a career
is it an income on your bank statement
is it the hunger for success
or is it making a difference
can you encompass them all
wrap them up together and pop on a bow

and what is love
is it that overwhelming bliss in your heart
that feeling of complete perfection
the thinking of and dreaming of the future
the understanding between two people
the trust between two people
the link that is seamless and unable to be tampered with
the bond
the knowledge
the puzzle that is now complete
the living together and sleeping together

and what is this life
is it just the most random experience
whereby nothing is impossible
where everything is for the taking if you want it
where hard work is reaped with reward
that if you fall you can hurt yourself
that if you sleep you can dream
the continuous learning and achieving
getting that brain absorbed in knowledge
having memories and remembering them
making mistakes and learning lessons

P

Fast goes the days as your time counts down
Place a hand on your chest
Can you hear your time running out?
Does it scare you?
Does it worry you?
Is your life all what you dreamed of?

I walk into a room, and I pick up a childhood picture
I look deeply into the eyes looking back at me
Would she be happy? Is she proud of what I've become?

Is my life something that can be measured with achievement?

What's next? Where do I go next?
No book tells me, only hints at listening to my own head and heart.. but is that enough?
Are other people also in this mindset?
Can this love I have save me?
Save me more than it already has?

I mean in all honesty this love has blown me away
Taken all my fears and squashed them
I have broken out of the cage I was so clearly stuck in
My trust has been awoken and has flourished
I feel invincible most days just from the reeling in my heart
The beat feels different
Happier and more consistent
The voice she has speaks to my soul
I feel like I could fly
Is this the beginning?
It seems to become more and more each day
Each morning I wake I am so happy to be lying next to her
She is my everything
Will my career go this way?

Is this what I have been waiting for all of my life?
Holding out for her
The love of my existence
Yes
Yes, it's as simple as that.
Thank you P
Thank you from the bottom of my heart

Modern day lives

I'm here
I'm right here and you haven't even seen me
Is this life now? Don't enter the location and lose your friends?
They don't recognise me you see
I've been busy
I've been living and sunning and loving and they have been waiting
Waiting for our meet up
I sit down, I'm exhausted, work have me on this project and my brain is in overdrive
I'm sat there drink in one hand, phone in the other
Chatting out my excitement of life, of love, how I'm engaged and it's so right
How well the house is coming on and how happy life is making me
They, well they just sit there
It's like they have only just seen me arrive
There minds are lost back three blocks in some other town, trying to catch up on my route
The hours fly and I'm tired
They have said nothing
Not a mutter
Not a sigh or ounce of recognition
Waitress comes
Bills paid
Tips on the table in the metal plate
I'm up and out
Coat on
Bag and phone
I've left
What was that?
Is that life in 2016?
Is that a friendship?

Lectures about life

The time will stand still
Enough is enough
Your heart will erupt
To everyone's shock
Not a word will calm the storm which has brewed
For you have had enough and you can't shield your eyes
The tears are like acid as they sting down your face
The skin is like filo as it's scratched from the haste
Not a person can save you, it has reached every brim
The story got evil and got drenched in your sins
I won't scare you now though
As the sun has come out
Just know I feel pain too and sometimes I can't cope
Not a hug nor a kind word can fix the pain I feel
But your face it can heal overtime all I pushed through

Chelsea Rent Boy

I see his face
caught in the night
our eyes lock for that one moment
for that moment, I am paralysed

See, to anyone else he is a just a person
but to me, I see the pain
I see the hurt straining in his eyes
I see the help in his expression
I know this isn't the life he wants

I am helpless
He is lost

I turn away, when I look back
he is gone

Soppy Thoughts on a Easter Sunday

Catch me as I fall out of the sky on nothing but my heart strings
I want you to see the height I have climbed
look at how much I have changed

See me as I grow through my life and find the love I have always wanted
the love that set me free
the love that wraps me up in cotton wool
the love that became my shadow
the shadow I wont live without, cant live without
the love I found and the love I have now

See my smile, see how deep it goes
see the love in my eyes, the glaze over
the heart, watch it beat out of time as I see her
See how I talk about her
Watch me as I speak
Hear my voice, listen to the words I say

Best time of my life, This is the best time I have ever had
I document it to remember it
remember when my life changed
when the sky became blue
when the sun never went down


The voice she has speaks to my soul
it controls me
I need her, want her, love her
Everyday
All day
Any time
For all of my life.