Time

Tell me about the days when your only worry was getting home in time for CITV

Tell me about the holidays and the sitting in the back waiting on sweets from your Mum

Where you just lived to experience and enjoy the day by day

When waiting on time was OK, when did we get so impatient? When did we get lost in the life trap?

We were just living in the present and the present was living in us and that was OK

Adulting has never felt so difficult

It has never felt so mundane in some ways and exciting in others

Rat run at its best

Keeping up and chasing others and tripping up and grazing knees 

But up you get, brush it off and just keep going

Barely a word, not even a whisper

Just silent betrayal of existence and praying for the next 

Reality through a filter

Drowning in minds’ thoughts that spiral 

Memories poke their head in without invitation

You are in dreams and your old life feels real

But you wake and it wasn’t 

Previous years feel like different people

You see the videos but can’t relate to the person

You see the posing and the nights out and the smiling face but can’t see the deeper hurt and pain 

Scratch the surface and you will see the real deal

Scratch the surface and you will see the portrayal we aspire to

You will see the social media storm that holds us accountable to checking in

You will see the popularity contest of smiles and achievements,

But go backstage

Go backstage and you will see people starving to look thin, people crying because they are lonely, arguing with each other, because it isn’t real love,

Just adding the filters to their lives

Using that setting spray to hold it all together

Booking more cosmetic work to hide the pain they have felt

Fillers and Botox to hide the lost love, or heartbreak

Broke from spending money on things they dont enjoy, to having pictures with people they dont like, to show the world they are living

How can you be busy living if you are always checking in, and posting?

Must look younger, must erase the past, must appear stable must hide age, must filter out the creases in case, must skip the meals, must inject the oxempic, must replace the smile, get new teeth, get new hairlines, get new hair, extensions, face lifts, lash lifts, brow lifts, lip fillers, cheek fillers, boob jobs, bum jobs, must have more weight, must have less weight, must have bigger muscles, must be shredded, must be slimmer, must be taller, must be happier, must stop complaining, must be on a diet, must be happy, must be happy, must be happy… 

Live a life but make sure the pictures show you haven’t suffered, haven’t been hurt, haven’t been ill, haven’t lost family or lovers or jobs or dreams, live a life but appear immaculate.

Fast forward to a 100 years ahead of time, what will our legacy be, a generation that experienced some of the scariest realities but pictures will appear like life had been so easy

Like a filter on the history

The history that never affected us, the battles, the lockdown, the death toll but a perfectly framed picture of people all smiling, perfect teeth, perfect skin, perfect lives 

Life is not a game